Management Training – Page 17 – STL

When a Director once gave a talk on the importance of developing relationships, I was left thinking I had to buy someone a gift. Maybe it isn’t too far from the truth. When developing skills that can influence a relationship, having a giving attitude is what can help make them spectacular. Find out here how to build spectacular relationships.

Recognition

The most powerful initiator in building a great relationship is recognition. I am not talking about a front-page editorial in the weekly rag. This is all about being present for the other person at every interaction. Listen thoughtfully, reflect ideas and interests that are important to them.

Be sincere and serious about the issues that affect them. Offer support without the need for solutions. After all, isn’t this the very technique you use when you want to impress someone?

How often I hear others say that the first time they met a life-long partner – there was a connection. He/she just seemed to understand me.

Giving others sincere recognition is the first stage in healing, just ask a psychologist.

I am amazed at how many professionals fail to see the effect they can have on others. The joy of a young child playing with a parent. The impact a senior director can have just spending a few minutes with a junior executive. How a famous actor can visit a children’s hospital ward and replace pain with joy. You have the choice to either light someone up or crush them.

The Critic

The third rail – touch it and fry. While giving others recognition is the gift to building a strong relationship, negative criticism is by far and away the slow toxic death. As a professional I grant you that critical analysis is an important component to business. Personal criticism, however, simply has no place, anywhere.

Yet in the modern world it seems that our natural, default position is to criticise. And wow, aren’t we just great at doing this? I can guarantee that if you put an idea forward, there will be at least 8 out of 10 people who will tell you why it can’t work.

So why do people fall into this trap? It’s all about power. I criticise you because it makes me feel powerful!

The last word

The extent to which we inspire one another, though we may be oblivious to it, is incredible. We listen and take a genuine interest. We practise understanding. Why? Because others excel with it, they want to work harder, be more productive, be as great as they can. This world continually proves that to claim power over another does not work. It is the wrong path, a dead-end, and has nowhere to go.

Remember, every time you criticise you leave a ‘bruise’. How long will that bruise take to reveal itself? It can leap out at you from hiding, when you least expect it. Deny people recognition, ignore them, substitute tolerance with dominance and watch the damage happen.

The gift is not buried in clever conversation and it is not how much you are willing to spend. It is free, it is generous, and most importantly, it is all about them. I hear so many people say they wish things were different. Be the change you want to see in the world. Start with yourself today.

Why won’t you answer?

So many time’s we send emails praying to get a quick response. Far too often that one reply necessary to move forward on our work doesn’t materialise. So, what are the secrets to getting that quick response? In this article we will try and shift the power back into your corner. Here are 5 Quick Ways to get a Response to Emails.

Social proof can be a catalyst for action.

‘We have heard from the rest of your team; we are just waiting for your department to confirm?’

It is hard for someone to realise they are holding up a process, or worse, that others are watching them.

Too often we ask for things that are centred on our needs. We forget who we are asking, and how important they feel our needs are.

Take some time and consider who is receiving your plea for help. Do they really care? This can be one of the biggest reasons for someone not responding. The secret is to provide a reason why, try using the word because. ‘Hi John, just really need that final figure from the weekend’s results. Accounts are waiting to move forward.’ Psychologists from Harvard proved that 93% of people will respond when the word ‘because’ is used.

And then there is the implication of a friendship by using their name more than once.

Something that can stir anyone into action is to feel that they are helping a friend. ‘Hi John, need that report pretty urgently. John, if you can get it to me by close of play, I can really get some traction on this deal and help us both out.’ Most people like the idea of a close working relationship, so why not make it so?

The next point is also in the last statement to John. What’s-in-it-for-them.

Most people are focused on their own responsibilities, and few will find favour having requests that mean nothing to them, so try placing the request with a ‘what’s-in-it-for-them’. ‘Hi John, think I can help you save a bucket load of time. John, if you could send over the report today, we will catch the deadline and avoid two months of headaches for you.’ As long as there is accuracy in your statements, all will go well. Remember that trust is the most valuable commodity that you can exchange.

And finally, the opportunity to use that powerful sense of humour you are just busting a valve to show-off – throw in a frog.

John gets an email begging him for his help and you will be so grateful, you will chuck in a pet frog. Humour can be the best medicine, and once the net is cast, can be utilised to further build the relationship. The requests may never end. ‘Where’s my pet frog you promised me a couple of weeks ago?’

At the end of the day, some emails are simply not worth responding too, but these 5 quick ways to get a response to emails will help yours get answered, fast.

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