Tag: assertiveness

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Hints & Tips Professional & Management Professional Development Soft Skills

Speak Up with Confidence: Guide to Assertive Communication

Effective communication is the lifeblood of any successful workplace. Among the various styles, assertive communication stands out as a powerful tool for fostering healthy relationships, resolving conflicts, and ensuring that your voice is heard. In this blog, we will explore the art of delivering assertive messages in the workplace and why it is essential for professional growth and collaboration.

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Understanding Assertive Communication

 

Assertive communication is a communication style that strikes a balance between passivity and aggressiveness. When you communicate assertively, you express your thoughts, needs, and feelings in a confident, respectful, and direct manner. It’s about speaking up for yourself while being considerate of others, and it’s a skill that can significantly enhance your workplace interactions.

 

Now, let’s explore some strategies to help you master assertive communication in your professional life:

 

  1. Use “I” Statements: Instead of framing your concerns as global truths or accusations, use “I” statements to express your feelings and thoughts. For example, say, “I feel overwhelmed when I’m given multiple tasks with tight deadlines” instead of “You always give me too much work.”

 

  1. Be Clear and Specific: Ambiguity can lead to misunderstandings. When delivering an assertive message, be clear and specific about what you want or what’s bothering you. Clearly articulate the issue and your desired outcome.

 

  1. Maintain Eye Contact and Body Language: Your non-verbal cues are just as important as your words. Maintain eye contact, stand, or sit up straight, and use open and confident body language to convey your message.

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  1. Active Listening: Assertive communication is a two-way street. Listen actively to the responses and feedback you receive. This shows respect for the other person’s perspective and can lead to more effective dialogue.

 

  1. Avoid Apologising Unnecessarily: One common pitfall is using unnecessary apologies, which can undermine your message. For instance, you can say, “I’m sorry, but I think we need to adjust the project timeline,” but the apology is not necessary. Instead, assertively say, “I think we need to adjust the project timeline.”

  1. Practice: Like any skill, assertive communication improves with practice. Start in low-stakes situations and gradually work your way up to more challenging conversations.

 

  1. Respect Boundaries: While assertiveness is about expressing yourself, it’s also about respecting the boundaries of others. Ensure you’re not coming across as pushy or invasive. It’s a fine balance.

 

  1. Seek Feedback: Encourage colleagues to provide feedback on your communication style. Constructive criticism can help you refine your approach and grow as an assertive communicator.

Summary

Mastering assertive communication in the workplace is a valuable skill that can enhance your professional relationships, problem-solving abilities, and overall job satisfaction. By understanding the principles of assertive communication and practicing its techniques, you can become a more effective and confident communicator, ensuring your voice is heard and your needs met while fostering a respectful and collaborative work environment.

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Hints & Tips Leadership Development Professional Development

Assertiveness Simplified

Assertiveness – what exactly is it? Getting your own way? Saying how you feel? Being upfront and honest? Telling it how it is? Well, many people get hung up and confused about what exactly assertiveness is and how you act in an assertive manner.

assertivness

If you research dictionary definitions, you’ll find the following: “confident and forceful behaviour.” or “behaving confidently and able to say in a direct way what you want or believe”, and “Someone who is assertive states their needs and opinions clearly, so that people take notice”, plus many more definitions. One simple way we at STL define assertiveness, is:

“Behaviour that involves standing up for your own rights, expressing your needs, wants, opinions, feelings and beliefs in a direct, honest way…without violating another person’s rights.”

Another great way, when you want to assert yourself is to do the following: show respect to yourself, then say or do what you need to, and then importantly – show the same respect to the other person(s). As an example, if you make excuses for yourself by saying “Sorry to ask and maybe I shouldn’t…” then this is not exactly showing yourself much self-respect – this is passive/submissive behaviour. Likewise saying for example, “I don’t care what you think – I feel this!” is showing the other involved little to no respect and is aggressive.

If you sometimes lack the confidence to act with assertiveness then these tips can be a big help:

  • Visualise yourself where you want to be
  • Do things that scare you – frequently
  • Question your inner critic
  • Focus on what you have achieved (rather than haven’t)
  • Help others
  • Don’t see others as better than you, just different
  • Be able to say no and not feel guilty

Other considerations for ensuring you remain assertive are:

  • Use short, concise sentences
  • Don’t use lots of excuses
  • Think about what you will say before you say it
  • Make sure your body language supports your position
  • Use the present tense; deal with what exists today
  • Be positive – rather than affirming what you do not want
  • Use positive self-talk
  • Act “as if” – give yourself permission to believe the idea is true right now

Conclusion

We all have rights at work, in addition to our legal working rights, and these are what is reasonable for us to expect in our relationships and in our communications with others. In the workplace as we interact with colleagues, superiors, and clients, we have a right to feel comfortable and secure in our relationships and communications. As well as this, we have a right to be treated fairly and respectfully. We should be able to express our opinions honestly without reprimand, whether we agree with others’ views or not, and seek assistance when needed. However, we should also take responsibility for our behaviour and mistakes, keep in mind that everyone is human, and no-one is perfect.

Assertive people feel connected to other people. They make statements of needs and feelings clearly, appropriately, and respectfully. Feeling in control of themselves, they speak in calm and clear tones, are good listeners, and maintain good eye contact. They create a respectful environment for others, and do not allow others to abuse or manipulate them.